Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
