just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
