is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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