We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
