I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
