the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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