How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
