Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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