vagina is talking i cant
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
