You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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