i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
