sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
