so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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