I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
