We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize