If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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