it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
