I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
