why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
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