Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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