She said her name was "party"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
my god I love twenty year old dicks
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
