i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
And then he peed in my hair
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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