If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The beer is more important than you right now.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
