My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
