that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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