Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
