even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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