Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
