I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
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Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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