I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
