I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
