New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
