Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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