jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
