Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
