i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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