I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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