Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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