It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
