New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
