Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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