my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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