why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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