Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
God, I missed his penis.
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