you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
