guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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