i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
