She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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