My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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