If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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