when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
she told me i tasted like america
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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