Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Randomize
